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Tag Archives: Stepparenting


I am a Stepmother. I am a Lighthouse.

There is no guide on how to stepparent. No ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’ stepparent-style best seller. There’s no wise proverbs, ‘old wives tales’ or oral stories passed down from generation to generation to provide guidance and support to new stepparents about to embark on their stepparenting journey. Soon-to-be stepparents do not get baby […]

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Finding Your Stepparent Rhythm

One of the most difficult challenges as a stepparent can be knowing when to step up and when to step back. There’s been many times during my stepmothering career that I’ve felt like I was doing the ‘Cha-Cha’ – two steps forward two steps back – at the wrong time and to the wrong music. […]

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better stepmum

7 Ways My Partner Helped Me Be A Better Stepmum

I walked into the stepmum gig reluctantly. I had studied and spent a great deal of my career working with separated and vulnerable children and families. I was well-versed in the high-conflict, complex, sticky-end of family separation and I wasn’t looking to open my personal life up to a partner with kids. So when my […]

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Authoritative parenting: What is it and why is it important for stepfamilies?

People’s individual approaches to parenting differ. A person’s parenting style is typically based on their culture, their upbringing, their age, their religion and societal expectations. For stepparents, parenting styles – much like everything else in the world of stepfamilies – have some extra influencers involved. How long your partner was a single parent before your […]

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13 things

13 Things I’ve Learnt From 13 Years as a stepmum

A few weeks ago was the ‘anniversary’ of the day I met my stepson for the first time. I had dated his dad for 6 months before meeting him. My stepson was 2 ½ and I was 30 years old. We’ve both grown a lot since then and here’s a few things I learned along […]

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Gender Roles in Stepfamilies: How Traditional Thinking Can Set Up You Up To Fail

This article originally appeared in the MARCH, 2015 issue of StepMom Magazine. No matter where you fall on the feminist continuum, there is no denying traditional gender roles exist. We all know them. Men go to work and are breadwinners. Women stay at home and are caretakers. What you may not know is that these […]

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Lights camera action2

“Lights, Camera, Action” – what step-parenting role will you create?

Hands down being a parent is bloody hard work. Being a step-parent can be even harder! If you are to weather the storm of assaults that both ex-partners and step-children, in particular teenage step children, can make on your self-esteem, judgement and authority it helps to have a great deal of self-confidence and a supportive […]

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Why Good Enough May Be Just Perfect: Stepparent Expectations

Let’s face it, stepfamilies are formed after divorce, the death of a parent or the marriage of a single parent who has, up to that point, raised their child alone. Stepfamilies do not come to pass without all those involved having already lived through at least one major life event and all the stressors that […]

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