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Step-parenting Obstacles: Shadows

I was reading a book the other day, “Between Two Homes – A Coparenting Handbook” by Bradley S. Craig, specifically chapter three which talks about the obstacles to establishing a successful cooperative, post separation parental relationship. Of the eight obstacles Bradley Craig talks about, there was one in particular that I think is also a […]

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Stepparent Wellbeing: Who’s On Your Team?

Call it what you will – a team, peeps, clan, kinfolk, your tribe. Most everyone has one. The group of ‘A-lister’ individuals you surround yourself with and can turn to whenever the occasion calls – and sometimes even when it doesn’t, just because they are a swell group of people who you like being around […]

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Fathering From The Middle – support for biological fathers in stepfamilies

The middle is not typically a place where any of us chooses to be. Think about flying, most of us prefer and are even willing to pay extra for the aisle or window seat on a plane. Depending on what we are queuing for, we tend to push to be at the front of the […]

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Top Tips For New Stepparents

Becoming a stepparent can be daunting. Figuring out your role as a stepparent — aside from the day-to-day responsibilities that come with it —may lead to confusion, uncertainty or even conflict between you and your partner, your partner’s Ex, and the kids. There is a lot of information and advice out there to help you […]

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Undercut & Undermined – what to do if your stepchild resists contact because parental authority is being undermined

When your stepchild seeks to exclude you or worse still reject you, your spouse/their parent and their entire stepfamily , it can be difficult to know how to react or what to do. It can be especially painful when you believe that you have gone out of your way to try and forge a relationship […]

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A Shout-Out To All The Stepmums On Mother’s Day

When you think about it, really think about it, stepmothers are pretty freaking amazing. These women take on responsibility for children who are not their own. Children who for the most part would do anything to NOT have a new stepparent in their world. These women accept their partner’s ex as a necessary part of […]

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Successful Stepcouple relationships: top tips for making it work

Whether it be a first or second marriage, divorce rates across the Western world are declining and have been for a while. The reasons behind the falling statistics are complex. But it’s suffice to say that divorce trends have been heavily influence by changing social norms about being a “divorcee”, living together prior to marriage, […]

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Stepfamilies, Time, Trade-offs & Tough Choices

We all want to think (and hope) that once we have found our king or queen, happily ever after and a blissful family will automatically follow. But if you have ever experienced heartbreak and divorce you know the reality is that happy families (and healthy relationships) don’t just happen because we fall in love. They […]

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Self-regulation – why it’s important for stepfamilies & co-parents

Self-regulation – why it’s important for stepfamilies and co-parents. Self-regulation is being able to manage feelings (particularly big feelings) so they don’t intrude heavily on our relationships or when going about our day-to-day life. It relates to the ability to resist losing it in situations where we are upset, frustrated or just plain pissed off […]

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A different Christmas

The carols are playing, the decorations are up and strings of lights are strung over houses with care. It all seems rather normal, but for repartnered families having a first (or tenth!) Christmas together, it can feel pretty surreal. We share Christmas with my stepson’s mother. One year he spends Christmas Eve and early Christmas […]

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